No Prada, No Thanks

Plenty of Cute people swarmed last night’s ϋmobile launch at the Rockwell tent. I decided to attend at the last minute because the friend I was to meet at Starbucks decided to intrude the occasion.

ϋmobile, from what I gathered from the breathless hype-o-rama is a new ad-centric mobile service but whoever designed its identity systems must be on federal-regulated substances. I was like: Come on! An umlaut over a Nickelodeon splat? How very…distinctive. No, not quite. It’s kind of creepy; like a grape that got run over by a ten-wheeler truck and still smiling.

“LG Collins will be raffling two hundred fifty phones!” someone from the PR team beams.

“Is it the LG - Prada phone?” I asked.

“I don’t think so. No.” came the reply.

“There goes my erection, then.”

He stared at me in the same way you would at a petri dish growth.

My friend nudged my ribs. Before I could protest he shoved a bottle of beer into my hand.

I didn’t win the phone because I left early. When my name was flashed onscreen as one of the winners I was already home furiously beating my...

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...deadline.