Graphic Details

Obsessive kibitzers of this blog (actually there’s only one anonymous voyeur who messaged me but I’m hallucinogenic so in the interest of shameless theatrics I’d exaggerate and write in the plural) demanded to know what’s my typical day like. The curiosity was conveyed through leaving an offline message at Yahoo Messenger. It alarmed me because I am beginning to fear he drank expired Kool-Aid that rendered his mental synapses suddenly screeching towards irreversible coma. I mean: This blog is not enough?! I have routinely inflicted unsuspecting bloghoppers with the most inane, dreadfully boring, mind-numbingly long-winded wordy litany of my daily minutiae delivered in steady monotones and still I get asked what my typical day is like?!?

*Insert augmented sound of one elongated manic shriek and rupturing veins here*

But I am not a crabby, lousy spoilsport. Ok, let me catch my breath and I’ll make you happy, son of a git!

Haha. Kidding on the expletive.

So, the question floating on the sauce pan is: what is my typical day like?

Aside from unvarying occurence of sexual arousal I can’t think of how to put my typical day in words. Since I’m increasingly, evidently brilliant, I thought I’d be more effective if I plot my daily preoccupations as information graphic. Yes! The fact that nobody in the entire blogosphere thought of this before instantaneously inducts me in the pantheon of genius! (Plagiarists: don’t even think about it!) Step sideways, ngarag-haired Einstein and your silly Theory Of Emcee Squares or something! I’m THE most gifted deoxyribonucleic acid strain to ever grace this undeserving phlegmatic earth! Yay me!

God, I am so good I’d marry me! Haha. Nah.

Anyway, in response to you, nosy anonymous offline messenger who probably followed a link from somewhere, let me give you a graphic description of my every day constitutional:

So there! Still I can’t believe I thought of this universe-altering blog idea, my brilliance is radiating through my nostrils; I’m so luminous, baby!

No, I didn’t overdose on Likas Papaya shit.